Death Cab for Cutie

Even though I claim to be a punk rocker at heart, I listen to many types of music.

Here's a band that is worthy of my musical affections. Funny how I found them after finding She and Him. Now it turns out that Zooey Deschanel and Ben Gibbard (of D.C.F.C.) are engaged. I wish them all the best and hope they keep making wonderful music for many years to come.

I found this video of a song I've been listening to a lot. Great art.

DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE

Don't Google Spider Bites: Update

Well, the visit to the ER was a worthy one.

By the time they got there, the bite area/shape had grown immensely. We were saying it looked like Patagonia or Pangaea. When I googled both, it really was that kind of shape, if you rotate them. But whatever it looked like, it had grown to about 5 inches across and all jagged looking. And it was raised more than before.

The ER doctor listened to the whole scenario. He did a head to toe exam. Watched the Princess as he went, asked her and the Queen lots of questions, got out a few books and even went online to cross reference.

Diagnosis: Cellucitis caused by an insect bite, and most likely a spider bite.

In order to further confirm diagnosis, will take blood and test for Lyme and MERSA. (few days later, got a call, both negative)

Working Orders: Change to a stronger oral antibiotic that targets cellucitis (skin infections). Remarked (circled) the bite area, gave instructions to continue to watch, if it grows OR stays the same, get back to doctor. If it gets smaller, follow up with primary doctor in 3-4 days.

First dose didn't bring much change. By the second dose, the Princess seemed to be much improved. She seemed her normal peppy self again. Pangaea had started to get smaller. Certainly it had gotten less jagged around the edges and it had also gotten less swollen and lighter in color. After a few more doses, it was almost normal skin color and down to an inch or so in size. After a little more time, it was gone.

Now it's a distant memory. She's back on the swing, on her scooter, invading her older brother's space, and everything else she's always done. No remnants, that is, except for her new found fear/phobia with spiders. Thanks mister spider.

Don't Google Spider Bites

Are you a cybercondriac? If you are and you are faint of heart, don't Google your symptoms.

My little princess got bitten by something last Thursday. I noticed the welt while I was helping her shower. I freaked out because it looked like to fang marks surrounded by a giant red circlish welt. Scary looking. I asked her, "How, When, Why?" and she said, "Mommy already saw it" and tried to move on. I called the Queen and asked if she did in fact already see it and why I wasn't informed about it.

At the time the Queen saw it, it wasn't as bad as it had gotten. When the Queen arrived home, we checked it again and it seemed bad. The Princess wasn't showing any symptoms except for some tenderness at the alleged bite site.

The next day (Friday) the ladies went to the doctor. Doctor said, "Hey! No More Monkeys Jumping On the Bed" (okay, they didn't say that, I'm just thinking like a 5 yr old). Anyway, doctor thought it was probably an insect bite and dished out some topical antibiotics. Orders were to apply topical solution and if, by Monday it hadn't gotten smaller, that they should return.

Things were fine all weekend. The only symptom was local tenderness. Monday came and it seemed to be roughly about the same size except the color inside the circle seemed better. Since it hadn't gotten smaller, they went back to the doctor. This time that doctor said, "Hmmmm, maybe it's a tick bite instead of a spider bite. I am prescribing 3 weeks of oral antibiotics in addition to the topical antibiotics."

So she takes the medicine and off she goes playing all day with her friends as if there is nothing wrong. At dinner time, as she is pulling her chair into the table, she bumps the area and yelps out in pain. Apparently the site is now more tender than it was previously.

Skip until bedtime. Just before bed, she is chillin' watchin' i-Carly. I ask her how she is doing and she seems a little dopey. Normally I'd just write it off to her dozing off and being sleepy but she doesn't snap out of it right away. I take a closer look and when I touch her, she is hot to the touch. Really hot. She had been all bundled up so I thought it might have been because of that but after being uncovered for a little bit her temperature didn't drop. I got out the thermometer and her temp was okay (which seemed bizarre since she was still hot to the touch).

We dosed her up with more of both antibiotics and got her into bed. The Queen laid with her until she went to sleep. A few hours later, when we were going to bed, she woke up. She was feverish and apparently was having bizarre fever dreams. The Queen snuggled her and I went off into our room. After a while I realized they were going to be up for a while so I went to sleep. When I woke up the Queen's pillow was gone. During the night, the Queen and come and gotten her pillow and camped out with the Princess in her bed.

This a.m. both were sleeping when I left for work (I did sneak in and woke the Queen for an update and a kiss goodbye). After arriving at work I got a call from the Queen that they were going to take a ride to the hospital. The Princess was acting fine but the site of the bite mark was now purple within the ring. So off they went and here I wait.

Damn, I hate being powerless. So why did I do? I Googled "spider bites" and "tick bites" and specifically I looked into spider bite pictures.

I suggest you DON'T. It's nasty. Then it freaked me out because I started envisioning my little girl with such a condition as was pictured. Talk about a freak out.

Step away from Google. Leave the medical diagnosis to the doctors. No arm chair quarterbacking.

Nice A.M. Surprise

I had a nice little surprise this a.m. I woke up a little earlier than usual so I was a little groggy while letting our puppy out for a her walk. As I was strolling around our back gardens, I stumbled upon a set of fresh blooms. These are the Queen's favorite flower.

It was such a peaceful start of the day. A nice little garden stroll. The gardens were soaking from a major thunderstorm and rain last night. And we were below the dew point so everything was glistening. So pretty.

Emperorer's New Clothes

Lately I've been half engaged with certain things in my life. Not my wife or kids. More with work and some of the volunteer work I do. Don't really know why and I'm not looking for a reason. I've just noticed a little apathy.

But the odd part is, if appearances are kept up, nobody is the wiser. With a little effort (half-ass, is you want to know the truth), I can maintain the impression that I am giving my 110% as usual. But it's a sham. It's the Emperor's New Clothes. It's a facade.



At first I thought it was due to my cloak and dagger superior skills. Or maybe I had some previously undetected skills of prestidigitation. I'm was a closet magician or sorcerer. I could veil my sloth with a wave of my hand.


Nope. I've realized that people on the receiving end probably haven't set their expectations as high as I've set my goals. So any effort is seen as "a job well done" even though I feel as if I am cheating them out of what I am really capable.


Just proves the point, "Just because I think it, doesn't mean it is reality."


I just can't past the fact that I am functioning at a sub-par level. Just coasting. I guess it's a guilt I have to carry until I take my head out of my ass and get back in gear.

5 Years of Yummy Goodness

Today is my little girl's 5th birthday. I scooped her out of her bed this morning while she was still sleeping and plopped her between the Queen and I in our bed. I snuggled my two women for a little bit, then I woke up my baby with tickles while singing (correction: trying to sing) Happy Birthday.

She is growing up too fast. She is so cute. She is so funny. She is a circus trapeeze artist and wild woman. She's my little girl. I love her so much.

Happy Birthday Princess.

She started out so different from her older brother. The Prince was a snuggler. From the start, he loved to burrow his face in your chest and snuggle you. Not the princess. No, she wanted to be held facing outward. And this was on her first day into the world. Always wanting to see what is going on. That is up until a certain age. She was a toddler and not a snuggler then as if you flipped a switch, she turned into a mega-snuggler.

As a younger sibling, she's always been chasing after the Princess (5 years apart). It's amazing how running with a pack of boys 5 years your senior can really jump start you motor skills. Not only can she skip (a motor skill that usually isn't in the bag of tricks until kindergarten) but she skips backwards. I don't think I can even skip BACKWARDS. And she's been doing it for about a year now. Lately she's been freakin' me out with her playground acrobatics. And when I say freak out it's because she is doing totally radical moves. I was a gymnast, a skateboarder, surfer, all around risk taker and I am nervous. And what does she say, "Oh dad, I'm fine, don't be such a baby". Damn, being put down and called a chicken by a 5 year old? Hmmpppttt.

On the other side of the coin from her tomboy is her prissy side. That too didn't surface until she was 2 or 3. Tomboy one day, playing dress up the next day. She flips back and forth between raw and rough and prissy and cute. Lately, she's gotten into clothes shopping and has an incredibly good sense of clothes. What can't she do?

Happy Birfday Baby. Many more. Enjoy your day.

Love,

Dad

14 years of Marriage

Okay, I've been quiet. Big deal. April was busy. Hell, May is even busier.

April 29th the Queen and I celebrated 14 years of marriage. There are usually cliches like, "It doesn't seem so long" and "Where did the time go?"

Not with me. My 14 years seems like a lifetime. So much has happened. My life is nothing like it used to be. Before the Queen arrived, I was just a guy. Carefree and uncommitted. Uncommitted to anything. Had relationships and jobs but they were all "just killing time". They didn't have any meat and taters. All fluff.

The Queen arrived and started grooming me. Not like a monkey picking lice groomin' (although she'd probably do it if there was a need). Grooming as in, "we are going places together"

Gots me some cool glasses. Also gots me some contact lenses. Gots me some non-bachelor clothing. Gots me some nice hairs cuts. Grooming inside and out. Grooming in, stand up for myself and get what I deserve at work, if it meant quitting and working somewhere else. Grooming me to no longer have a door mat personality. Stand up for your rights lessons.

Worked well. I cleaned up nicely. I went from living in a crappy little apartment to a nice place. Went from little mom-and-pop businesses into the corporate world. Went from being an unstable surfer, punk-rocker artist flake into a corporate raider/parent/mortgage holding fool.

All the way, the Queen put up with my growing pains. I didn't just become my new self over night. I fought it at times. I knew I'd be giving up carefree for responsible. And responsible isn't always fun. Hell, it is usually NOT fun. But it has it's rewards. Biggest one is, my kids. They are the best. Without the Queen, I'd still be surfing and clubbing it and being a free spirit but I would have been a lone wolf. Not these days, I'm DAD. And I am loving it.

Thanks Queen. You are a real trooper. You signed up "for better or worse" and I've pushed thing over the worse line on more than one occasion. Thanks for putting up with me. Thanks for helping us beat the odds and stay married. Thanks for being you and letting me be me (after the initial grooming period).

47 Years Old

Well, now it was my turn. 15 days after the Queen turned 40, I turned 47.

OLD.

Not that I am too concerned about age and birthdays, I did have some weirdness just before the big day. 47. Man, when I was a kid, 47 was OLD. Back in the late 60's and early 70's, I kept hearing the hippies saying, "Never trust anyone over 30". Thirty came and went. So did 40. Something about 47 was odd. Even though at 46 if you round up, it's 50 but it was still straddling 45 so it didn't seem that big of a deal.

47.

But where am I? I am so happy where I am at. At 30, there were so many things that I started to want. A lasting relationship. A career. Blah-de-blah-blah. house, family, dog and that damn white picket fence.

I've got them. I have them good. Great wife (a.k.a. the Queen) and the two bestest kids around. A funny and psycho weinie dog. We are in fact lacking the white picket fence but you have to make sacrifices in life.

I took off work on Friday to celebrate (Saturday, the Prince has opening day for Little League baseball so that was going to dictate our lives for that day). All weekend brought us perfect weather. So Friday, the Queen and I dropped the kids off at their schools for a half day. We went out for coffee and chilled. At noon we picked them up, and a friend of the Prince's, and went out to lunch. I am a very adventurous eater and love most foods. I am rather partial to sushi so we went to our new favorite place. The prince and I had sushi and everyone else had hibachi. The Princess did try and like some sushi. My kids are the best when it comes to trying and enjoying new foods.

We found our way home and spent the afternoon relaxing and watching the kids play. The Queen ran out for some party supplies. Later on, good friends came over and we had a low keyed birthday party. The friends brought some fun party supplies and all was right with the world.

For the rest of the weekend, I kept thinking about where I am and where I want to go with my life. I realized I am very happy exactly right where I am. I was such a settling feeling to have such contentment.

But with all good things, it has to end. Monday arrives. Back to work, back to the grind. And yet, it's not a problem. Because I am in a great place.

The Queen Turns 40!

This past Saturday we celebrated the Queen's 40th Birthday.

A good time was had by all.

I had asked the Queen what type of shindig she wanted to celebrate the day with many months ago. Big party? Little party? In a hall or home? Catered? Themed?

She wanted an adult party, at home, not so small but not too big. Just cool people, everyone chill and have a good time. Good food, lots of booze but not a fall down drunk affair.

Turn out to be a perfect night. The right mix of people showed up. Everyone had fun. A lot of fun. We had one person, and not one of the usual ones, be so wasted we think she was speaking in tongues. Or she was speaking backwards. We were going to spin her backwards real fast and see if she would speak normally. Then we rethought the idea of spinning someone who has been drinking. Anyway, lots of fun.

It took 4 people to light the candles. But the Queen only took one breath to blow them all out (yea!). Kids came back after 3 on Sunday. Fun times.

On the Canvas: Happy Birthday to the Queen

Here's what went down of Friday night.

Grandma and grandpa came to get the kids around 6:30. They walk in and kids are ready to go. We tell the kids to chill so we can visit with them for a bit. Kids really want to boogie so they load up their stuff and we start the goodbyes. Grandma slipped me some coin (= lots) for "fun". They drive off.

We got out to one of our favorite restaurants. We get sat next to a young couple with a 12 month old girl. Baby is so well behaved but wants to walks, squirm, and anything that will keep mom and dad from eating peacefully. They apologize to us, we tell them they aren't a bother and actually a joy because we are kid free and enjoying it. We have appetizers, cocktails, dinner, and dessert. Go to mall to walk off dinner and to buy a tiara for the Queen. Go home, chill out. The Queen wants to retire around 11:30 pm. I'm am torn between going and crashing OR going and painting. I chose the latter. Painted from midnight on.

Still has much work, especially their eyes and their smiles. Good start.

Marriage Advice to a Four Year Old

Wow, fun start this morning. I'm done with the morning shuffle and almost out the door for work, when the Queen calls me.

The Princess had jumped into our bed with the Queen to snuggle. She must have been dreaming about or thinking about this when she woke up. It seemed to be a big issue with her. The Queen told her that I might know the answer or be able to help.

Here was her issue.
Will she be able to find a husband that will get along with her imaginary friend? Is there such a man?

Good question. Well, maybe a little early to ask it. Being 4 years and 10 months old, one shouldn't really be too concerned about a potential spouse. But it is a reasonable question worth a reasonable answer.

Here was my attempt at it:
Yes. There will certainly be men chasing her, she's pretty and smart and funny. All very appealing attributes.

And my advice is, not to jump at the first guy that comes along. Marrying someone is supposed to be a big deal. And choosing the right person means choosing a person that likes you just they way you are. The person should accept you for who you are, not what they expect you to be. This includes you likes and dislikes. It includes whether or not you want kids. Whether you are an active, adventurous person or a lay around relaxing person. Whether you like holiday and birthdays or no celebrating. What you are, who you are. Who you hang out with.

So to my Princess, if you find a man, he BETTER be able to be friends with Jackson your imaginary friend and that is that.

How I See It

I was up a little early today. I let the dog out and was standing in the backyard and realized something about myself. I see things differently than most people. I have the ability to look beyond, around, or through things.

No. Not like Superman.

I see a lot on the inside. I use my visual stimulus gathered from all around me, then I process it for my mind's camera. But it's happening in real time, like a movie. So what I see is altered from reality. Don't get me wrong, not REALLY see. But imagine see. Pre-visual see? Hard to explain.

Hey I know, let's use visual examples....

First, here's the view.....

It's nice sunrise. Nothing out of the ordinary but nice. Looks like it will be a nice day. Wispy clouds. But the view is obstructed by the shed, fence, and multiple power lines. But the base elements are good. Great tree silhouettes, nice blue sky, and soft, inviting clouds.

How do I change it? I've use Photoshop to demonstrate how I turn this into something nicer. In my head I wash away the power lines (only roughed them out in Photoshop, I am actually capable of rendering new ones and making the work undetectable but this is a quick demo and not worthy of laborious p-shopping. So I do the clean-up and then I also consider the chroma and intensity of color. Sometimes I even change the composition but I'm again not taking the p-shopping that far.

So here's what my mind's eye sees.....
So what do you think?

Am I an odd bird?